


Solace

by WolfenM



Series: Getting to Know You [1]
Category: Stargate - All Series, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Character Study, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Introspection, POV Daniel Jackson, POV First Person, POV Vala Mal Doran, Romance, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-17
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-22 22:52:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8304256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfenM/pseuds/WolfenM
Summary: Daniel suspects Vala is more anguished over recent events than she'll admit, and is determined to help her through. Through the course of the evening, both he and Vala are forced to face their feelings regarding Sha're and Adria -- and for one another.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written circa late 2006, tweaked slightly for this reposting (I figure it's about time I get my Stargate stuff posted over here). Takes place IMMEDIATELY after the end of "Counterstrike", AR to "Memento Mori". It was supposed to be just a short, 2- or 3-page little thing, but it kept growing, and growing .... This was my first-ever Stargate fic! As such, it originally head-hopped a bit (it was before I understood what head-hopping was, or that it was frowned up) -- I've tried to alleviate that, but for parts where I didn't want to lose the other viewpoint, I just separated the viewpoints using section markers, so it might be a touch choppy in spots. It's a slight songfic too, because I was listening to a few songs during the week I worked on it, and was struck hard by the appropriateness of certain lines in regards to the Daniel/Vala relationship.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Daniel Jackson, Vala Mal Doran, Jack O'Neill, Sam Carter, Teal'c, Cameron Mitchell, Carolyn Lam, Walter, General Landry, Bra'tac, Adria, the Stargate, and the Ori ©/TM Stargate (II) Productions, Kawoosh Productions, The SCI FI Channel, Showtime/Viacom, Sony/MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, Gekko Productions. Lyric snippets from "Before You", "Far Away", and "Eve" © Chantal Kreviazuk/Sony Music, and are not used in their entirity, nor with permission. Lyric snippets from "Journey to the Past" and "At the Beginning" © Lynn Ahern/Atlantic Records, and are not used in their entirity, nor with permission.

Daniel hesitated a few moments, before following after Vala. Even as he trailed her, part of him felt he should leave her be, that nothing he could say would help — except that he _had_ helped, hadn't he? When he'd told her about his wife, she'd seemed ... sympathetic? Yes, but more importantly, she seemed grateful, either for proving he _did_ understand her pain, or for trusting her with a bit of his own pain. And there was something else in her reaction as well, now that he thought about it. She'd seemed ... _surprised_? Yes, that was it.  
  
_I never **told** her that I'd been married once_ , he realised, immediately feeling guilty. Then he wondered why he should feel so — it wasn't like he had an obligation to tell her anything of his personal history. _Oh no? Friends **do** that_ , he chided himself. _They share their lives. But ... **are** we friends?_ She'd tortured him the first time they'd met, after all. She'd lied to him time and again after, entrapped him with a device that nearly killed him (and her), and nearly gotten him killed in numerous other scenarios. He'd wanted nothing more than to be rid of her when they were connected by the Kor Mak Bracelets ... and yet he couldn’t seem to stay away from her these days, even when he had a choice. Sure, she'd _saved_ his life a number of times, and proven her loyalty to SG-1 over the recent months, but ... when had she gone from being a constant annoyance to a bosom companion?  
  
And why the hell was he so insistent on following her now?  
  
He was at her side and talking to her before he could answer his own question, positively or negatively, much less turn around and high-tail it back the way he'd come.  
  
"Headed for the mess hall?" he asked.  
  
She shook her head, tossing long glossy black hair that was no longer restrained by the pigtails she'd worn earlier in the day. The change was sadly appropriate, her usual playful and girlish mode buried well under the weight of having birthed the woman who might destroy their galaxy. The heartache of knowing someone you loved was hell-bent on mass murder on a multi-global scale was a state of being he wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy, much less a best friend. Whatever Vala was to him now, he wished he could spare her the pain and give her back the very childish demeanor he'd once found so irritating. Although, there was some comfort in knowing that she _could_ be serious, when times called for it ....   
  
Glancing at him out of the corner of her eye, looking uncharacteristically irritated that he was still accompanying her despite her terse, wordless response, she finally granted him a verbal acknowledgement. "I'm going to my quarters. It's been a long day. Although I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep," she added heavily, and more to herself.  
  
He bit his lip, trying to think of a reply. As much as he knew it was rude to tag along where he wasn't wanted, he just didn’t feel right about leaving her alone, under the circumstances.  
  
He remembered the time she'd ambushed him in his room, looking for a little rough-and-tumble; he'd rejected her, insisting that she had no real interest in him, and offering her a laundry list of her own psychoses in regards to physical intimacy as evidence. Seeming very hurt, she'd given him a sob story about her lonely childhood, only to indirectly confess to making it all up when he'd called her on it.  
  
He'd assumed she'd been genuine when he'd asked "Are you messing with me?" and she'd replied, all hurt gone from her voice, with "Is it working?" But as time went on, he'd started to suspect it was really the sob story that was true, and _not_ the playful way she'd been when she'd insinuated she'd been pulling his leg. He might not have been able to tell back then, but with all the time they'd spent together since, he'd become something of an expert on her lies — on her behavior in general, really. And with that expertise and the events of the day in mind, he refused to abandon her now, even if she really did seem to want to be alone. He didn’t doubt for a second that she would stay by his side, if their roles were reversed; she really was a caring person, behind her selfish facade.  
  
He didn’t let himself entertain the notion that, if she had indeed been lying about lying, then maybe that meant she really _had_ been genuinely interested in him, and not just toying with him. He also refused to dwell on those fleeting seconds when he'd wanted to take her up on her offer, much less consider whether he'd take her up on it if the question ever came up _again_.  
  
Instead, he told himself, somewhat impishly, that he owed her for all the times _he'd_ wanted to be alone and _she'd_ refused to leave _him_ be.  
  
"It's on my way; why don’t I stop in and make you some chamomile tea to help you sleep?" he asked in a way that was more of a statement, making it clear that he would _insist_ upon doing it if she tried to argue against him.

 

~ * @ * ~

  
Vala paused ever so slightly at Daniel's suggestion, just barely stopping herself from asking him why he was being so nice all of the sudden. She knew the reason: he felt sorry for her. No, wait, that wasn't right: he _sympathised_ with her, and she knew the sympathy was genuine, that he really _did_ know how she felt. She'd seen it in his eyes when he'd dropped the bombshell on her about his wife. Of course, she doubted he knew anything about the _other_ emotions that had flooded through her when he'd made his revelation; she couldn’t really define them herself. Well, no, that wasn't true. She'd been jealous when she heard he'd had a wife. Then she'd felt terrible guilt over her reaction — especially since technically she was married to the still-very-much-alive Tomin, whom she also care for, if not exactly loved. And then she was heartbroken on Daniel's behalf, for his loss. (What _was_ it about an angst-ridden man that was so damned attractive, anyway?) Add a splash of hurt in there over the fact that he'd never told her about his wife before, and a bit of shock in general over the revelation, and she'd found herself reaching previously unexplored emotional depths, all because of this man at her side.  
  
But the fact that she was attracted to him in the first place wasn't really news to her, just the _scope_ of the attraction. Was this love? At the very least, after being rejected and brushed off by Daniel time and time again, it felt more than a little nice to have him be so attentive now. If this _was_ the first stirrings of love, who knew if an opportunity like this would come for her again?  
  
Especially if Adria follows through with whatever she has in mind for him, she thought with a shudder, remembering the menacing tone in her daughter's voice as the Ori Savior had revealed that she had some cryptic plan for him. The memory sat like a glacier in Vala's gut, sending ice-water tendrils of fear through her veins. The truth was, as much as she wanted to help SG-1 save the universe yet again, (if only to make up for drawing the Ori's attention in the first place and maybe patch up her karma a bit), if she really took a good hard look at her motives, she'd find that, more than anything, she just wanted to keep Daniel safe — saving everyone else was just a nice bonus.  
  
Thoughts of Adria and the Ori threat aside, Vala had always been the sort of woman to take life by the horns and live to the fullest. After all, in her line of work, every breath could be your last! She made up her mind then to enjoy whatever time she and Daniel had left together, in whatever way he was willing to spend it.  
  
She mustered up a brave smile. "Coffee."  
  
"Coffee's not going to help you sleep."  
  
She sighed affectedly. "Are you going to tuck me in, too?" she added in a tone she hoped was teasing, but feared sounded as hollow as she felt.  
  
"If that's what it takes to get you to bed," he replied, wincing as his brain apparently caught up with his mouth.  
  
Vala noted that a blushing man was as attractive as one in emotional turmoil. _It's the sensitivity_ , she told herself. _I didn’t think they **made** men like that in real life. Sha're was one lucky woman._  
  
She allowed herself a small smile, and in the process, a bit of her old, devilish demeanor peeked through. "Daniel Jackson, for _shame!_ You must treat a girl to more than a drink to get her into bed these days: I expect no less than dinner and a movie."  
  
The Daniel of just a few months past would have sputtered and groused at her insinuation; now he just looked relieved. Vala's asking him to take her to dinner had become something of a running gag between them; he was probably relieved to see her acting like her old self. To her surprise, though, for once he seemed intent on humoring her, tipping his head towards her conspiratorially. "Would you settle for grabbing something from the mess and watching TV until we fall into sugar-induced comas?"  
  
She was both elated and disappointed: she knew there wasn't much likely-hood of them capping the night by sleeping together, but the fact that he was willing to keep her company until she could fall asleep was something of a breakthrough, she reckoned. Then it occurred to her that maybe _he_ needed the company as much as she did; it touched her deeply, to think he'd seek solace from _her,_ instead of Teal'c, Sam, or even Mitchell.  
  
She held out her elbow and gave him a bemused grin. "Deal."  
  
He mirrored her smile, right down to the melancholy behind the eyes, and linked his arm with hers.

 

  
* * *

They grabbed a couple of trays from the mess hall, foregoing the night's meal of liver and onions in favor of piling the trays high with snack foods, desserts, and cans of soda. Back at her quarters, they set their spoils on the coffee table, Vala plopping herself down on the loveseat and aiming a remote at the TV across from her. All the bits of furniture were worn but perfectly functional, having been recently procured for Vala from a second-hand shop somewhere. The team were even pitching in together to get her digital cable, "to help her understand Tau'ri culture better" Mitchell and Sam had insisted. Daniel hadn't bothered to point out that _he_ didn't have digital cable, and did just fine without. He told himself that it was better having her occupied in her room by the TV while he studied ancient texts in his office — although sometimes his office seemed too quiet now ....  
  
The cool air of her room reminded him of just how sweaty he'd gotten wearing the typical SG-1 gear during their mission. "Man, I _really_ need a shower. I'll be back in fifteen or so," Daniel told her. "I _promise_ ," he added, having noticed the alarm that flashed in her eyes.

 

~ * @ * ~

  
Vala nodded reluctantly. "I probably should take one myself." She bit back the suggestion that he just share hers, afraid of scaring him off entirely. She needlessly walked him to the door, watching him slip into his quarters across the hall before closing it. And while the hot water sluiced over her aching shoulders, she tried _very_ hard — and very unsuccessfully — not to imagine the water glistening over the lightly-bronzed flesh in an identical shower across the hall.  
  


* * *

  
  
Vala was still in the shower when Daniel came back. The door to her suite was unlocked, so he let himself in after tentatively calling her name through the door. To be safe, he put on some music, so she would know he was there before stepping out of the bathroom. Like the furniture, they'd gifted her with a second-hand boom-box with a cd-player. He wasn't familiar with the vocal artist in the player — something Sam had provided, he guessed — but he admired the female singer's ability to hold a note.  
  
"Daniel?" Vala asked, poking her head out of the bathroom. When she saw that it was indeed him, she stepped out of the bathroom clad only in a towel, having forgotten to take a change of clothes out of her dresser and into the bathroom.  
  
"Oh!" He quickly turned. "Ah, s-sorry, I-I guess I should have waited outside."

 

~ * @ * ~

  
She stifled an annoyed sigh as she got out her clothes and began to change. _Spoilsport. He didn’t have to be so eager to look away!_ Then it occurred to her that his hasty spin might have had less to do with any revulsion and more to do with the simple fact that he was a gentleman. She still wasn't used to dealing with such an honest, _good_ person; it kept her both off-balance and on her toes. She, on the other hand, was finding it harder and harder to pull the wool over his eyes; despite his status as a 'white hat', he was not naïve or gullible. But maybe she could find other ways to keep _him_ off-balance....  
  
A new song came on. She grinned and picked up a hairbrush, emulating something she'd seen on the TV; pretending the brush was a mic, she began to sing along to the dulcet strains of Chantal Kreviazuk:  
  
"Baby, before you,  
I was bad news!  
In lettin' me love you,  
I think I can get through!"

 

* * *

Daniel spun around, heart racing; his eyes fell upon Vala's back as she danced to the music. He was relieved to realise that the words were not her own, and yet ... he felt a little sad as well.  
  
_Kind of like how she'd said she was relieved when we thought Adria was dead. She was telling the truth, but being relieved didn’t mean she wasn't also mourning the loss,_ he reckoned. _And it doesn’t mean she isn't afraid she might yet have to kill her own child, now that we know Adria survived...._ He forced such thoughts into a dark corner and put on a smile before she turned back to him.  
  
"But I think it's kind of funny  
That'cha say ya love me ..."  
  
His heart skipped a beat, but the cheerful mask held. Grinning back, she took his hand and pulled him into the center of the room, trying to get him to dance. Funnily enough, It didn't take much convincing; he was all to glad to see her smiling again.   
  
"Ya tell me that I'm crazy,  
then ya smile!"  
  
He laughed outright at this; the line seemed to describe almost every non-emergency moment they'd ever had together lately. He spun her.  
  
"And now I think I’ll get through  
the end of the world!"   
  
With those lyrics, the reminder of impending doom, reality threatened to break into their bubble of seeming normalcy like water behind a cracking dam. Understandably, she faltered; he caught her. It was like the song was written for them; in fact, he wished they _had_ , that it was a prophecy saying he _would_ get her through this ....

As he held her, seeing the war between fear and hope in her eyes as she stared back, his heart seemed to beat a thousand times in the span of a single second; he wondered if hers did the same. This close, he noted a scent of rose about her, inhaling deeply ....

Then, the moment was gone, Vala laughing nervously as she righted herself. She started singing again, dancing around him and trying to get him to do The Bump as she went (and, shockingly, succeeding on the third try).  
  
"...you picked me up  
out of the rough,  
and you polished me up,  
and made me brand new!"  
  
There it was again, in her eyes, in her voice; behind her playful silliness was something genuine. She seemed to believe the words, to be thanking him for the opportunity to prove herself. But, as if to distract him from that truth, she tried again to engage him in dance, this time under the pretense of teaching him something of her own people. The steps were reminiscent of a court dance, like the allemande; he picked it up easily, as if they were movements he'd already known but simply forgotten. Soon they were circling each other with graceful meetings of hands, shoulders, waists, their smiles and eyes dancing too.  
  
The song changed, and they smoothly adjusted their movements for the change in tempo; the new lyrics, though, made them falter repeatedly. Daniel pretended the missteps were only the result of his own inexperience, while Vala blamed a lack of practise on her part, each apologising again and again and laughing, as if trying to drown out the words.

 

~ * @ *~

  
" _Make me believe  
in you  
Honestly, for real,  
one thing true_ "  
  
Vala didn’t sing this time, and it was just as well; that stanza had been better suited as being from him to her, anyway. She knew it, and it stung, even though he hadn’t said it himself. But the next lines were hers again, even if she didn’t opt to sing along.  
  
" _Take me in,  
in your arms  
Wandering alone  
seems so far_ "  
  
And he did take her in his arms, if only for a moment, but she couldn't bring herself to believe it was more than what the dance required of him. They circled on, and she pretended to ignore the words in favor of concentration on the steps — but even from under their laughter, she heard them loud and clear, and half regretted putting the music on at all. The other half was willing to take what she could get of Daniel touching her like this, hoping he ignored the words too.   
  


* * *

" _Cause I know that  
we'll meet up again  
in forever  
Let me know  
you'll be waiting for me  
in the end!_ "  
  
Not long ago, Daniel could have believed those words were somehow sent from Sha're, assurance that they'd reunite when he Ascended once more. But now ... now they could have been from Vala to him — or even from him to Vala. He wouldn’t contemplate which, wouldn't admit that part of him hoped the former — and conceded the latter. No matter which of them made it, it could have been a promise that, whatever happened with the Ori, they'd be together when it was all over, whether they were still in this realm or if they were Ascended. Thinking how easily that promise could be broken, thinking of a universe without her, he was surprised to feel his throat tighten. Well, no, he wasn't surprised. Still, he fought hard against the tears that threatened to betray his true feelings to her, feelings he wasn't yet ready to acknowledge to himself.  
  
If he could, though, he'd curse the Ancients for all eternity over their refusal to get involved in the war, their continual willingness to let him — or even _force_ him to — lose everyone he'd ever cared for, one person after another. But the song called out to him, forcing him to shake away his anger as a dog shakes away water, for _her_ sake. He was there to make her feel _better_ ....  
  
" _You're far away from me!  
Come a little closer,  
just a little ..._ "  
  
Obeying the words without realising, they both slowed, drawing nearer to one another. Their lips, less than half a foot apart now, seemed drawn to each other like magnets — until he looked into her eyes and saw all his fears mirrored there, a single tear tracing the curve of her fine cheekbones. He drew her against him, wrapping his arms around her and burying one cheek in her hair. He felt her nails dig into the back of his shirt as she held him back in a vise-like grip, making it hard to breathe, but he didn’t stop her. He refused to push her away this time. She shuddered against him with silent tears, and he stroked her soft black hair soothingly.  
  
"We _will_ get through this, Vala," he promised, echoing the refrain of the first song with a conviction he didn’t quite feel.  
  
She laughed through her tears. "You're a terrible liar, Daniel Jackson.... It's all right, though — I'm a terrible _person_ , so it's all I deserve anyway," she added softly.  
  
"Hey!" He pulled back just enough to cup her chin and lift her eyes to his. "No one in their right mind would have expected you to kill your own _child_ , Vala, I _told_ you that!"

 

~ * @ * ~

  
Vala pulled away, and they both shivered with the sudden loss of heat. "But that's just it, Daniel: she's not _my_ child, is she? She's a grown woman that I barely know; I was ..." _violated!_ But she couldn't bring herself to say it aloud. "I was just an _incubator_ for the Ori. And if it weren't for that damn necklace, I _would_ have killed her when ..." _...when she threatened **you**. _ But she couldn’t say _that_ aloud, either. _I _would_ have chosen him over my child. But if he can’t even love me now, how could he ever love me after I'd done **that**? I might not have you as a lover, my Daniel, but I **can’t** lose you as a friend...._  
  
She hadn't noticed the song change while she was grieving in his arms, but suddenly the lyrics assaulted her ears like a physical blow.  
  
" _And could I die  
in my mother's arms  
like her?_ "  
  
Vala hit the "off" button, heart racing. Two seconds were all it took for her to regain her composure, her cheerful mask only slightly cracked as it slid back into place and she faced Daniel again.  
  
Lacking in guile as he was, Daniel wore his own emotions openly. "Vala—" he started, apparently unable, for all his vast intelligence, to think of something comforting to say that wouldn't ring false. She reckoned he wasn't all that used to having to deal with people, and books never needed comforting.  
  
The sad, lost look in his eyes made her squirm. "I think that's enough dancing and wallowing ey? Nothing like a good cry to work up an appetite!" she proclaimed with as much positive energy as she could muster, accentuating it with volume to pick up the slack in joy, desperate to dispel the melancholy that threatened to flood the room until they both drowned.  
  


_* * *_

_The problem is, that was nothing like a good cry, Vala,_ Daniel thought to himself. She was such a good performer that, had this conversation happened just a few months ago, he would have believed the tears to have been the act, and the grin she now wore to be the reality. But _knowing_ what was the truth now didn’t really help him see a way to _handle_ it, especially since her coping mechanism seemed to be to simply _ignore_ pain. How could you make someone face something they were determined not to see? All he could do was ride the evening out and chip away at her defenses little by little until she felt safe enough with him to let go. He knew how grief could fester like a wound. He'd needed his friends to get him through Sha're's death; for all Vala's strength, he was certain Vala needed a friend the same way now.  
  
Oblivious to his intentions — and, seemingly, everything else — Vala hopped over the back of her threadbare loveseat, bouncing a few more times than momentum actually demanded on the re-stuffed cushions. Daniel came around the side like the civilized Tau'ri that he was, then plopped himself down with considerably less grace than her effortless leap over the couch-hurdle. He wondered where she got her energy; was the high-sugar feast laid out before them typical of her diet?  
  
As if in answer, Vala struggled with opening a bag of M &Ms, her efforts getting increasingly violent. She caught the silent, laughter-suppressing shaking of his shoulders out of the corner of her eye. "Here!" She held the bag out to him. "Put those big muscles of yours to good use for once, Research-Boy!" she demanded with mock-irritation.  
  
Trying to hide his pleasure at her back-handed comment, Daniel obeyed with an overly-cultured "Yes, Your Highness!" He managed to open the bag, but a little too forcefully, a shower of bright candies spilling in all directions.  
  
"Oh, hurry, grab the ones on the floor!" Vala cried, bending over and scrambling to pick the candies up from the carpet. "... four, five!" She held a double-handful up triumphantly. "Why didn’t you pick any up?" she scolded, looking offended at his empty hands. "Now you've gone and wasted the rest!"  
  
"Mitchell taught you about the 'five-second rule', I see."  
  
She started at the candy a moment, then looked back at him sheepishly. "There ... _is_ no 'five-second rule', _is_ there?"  
  
Daniel shook his head, his lips tight with mirth. When he'd composed himself enough, he told her, "If it's going to have germs on it at all from being on the floor, five seconds really aren't going to make a difference either way."  
  
She stared dejectedly at the candies. "Somehow I doubt my floor is 'clean enough to eat off of'," she remarked; he had a feeling she was referencing a commercial for floor cleaner. "Hey, it's true!" she said, brightening. It was a little dizzying to him, how quickly she could change gears. She dumped the candies on one of the trays and held her palms out to him. "They really _don't_ melt in your hand! See?"  
  
He grinned. Watching her reactions to "Tau'ri culture" was nearly always either highly amusing or fascinating — usually both.

 

~ * @ * ~

  
Vala dug into the half-bag that was left. She pulled out a green one. "Open wide!" she ordered. Bemused, he obeyed, and she popped the candy obligingly into his mouth. "Is it true what they say about the green ones?" she asked innocently as she fished out another, threw it into the air, and caught it in her mouth.  
  
Daniel seemed to nearly choke, then quickly took a swig of soda. "Ah, no, that's ... that's just an urban legend," he said, shaking his head dismissively, but not entirely convincingly.  
  
_There's that cute, blushing boy again_ , she thought, hiding a smirk behind her own can of soda. Daniel seemed to having forgotten about the chamomile, or the fact that they were supposed to be helping her get to sleep; that suited her just fine.

Trying to be nonchalant after his little accident, Daniel picked up the remote and started channel-surfing.  
  
"Wait!" Vala demanded suddenly, attention caught by a bright splash of colour on the screen. "Go back two channels!"  
  
He did, and moaned a bit. " _Anastasia_?"  
  
Vala had found the concept of animation utterly fascinating; no other culture she'd ever encountered had anything even remotely like it. Really, it was astonishing that the Tau'ri had come up with it at all, this notion of displaying drawings in sequence so that they appeared to move!  
  
"Let's watch _this_!" she insisted.  
  
He looked pained. "But ... it's a _cartoon_. _Kid's_ stuff. With _singing_. A-and this one is completely inaccurate, historically-speaking!"  
  
She raised a brown. "And how much of what's on the television _is_ historically accurate? I suppose all the programmes on Ancient Egyptian mythology talk about the Goa'uld, do they? Or that depictions of Thor and Odin resemble little grey-skinned aliens? Hmm?"  
  
He nodded, thoughtful; she had a point. And now she had reminded him once again of just how keen her powers of observation were — and how intelligent she really was, even if she was still mostly ignorant of Tau'ri culture. "All right, we'll watch it," he conceded, laying the remote on the table and carefully opening a bag of chips, which Vala immediately helped herself to.  
  


* * *

  
Despite his earlier protests, Daniel found himself easily sucked into the movie. Perhaps it was the fact that he recognised the voice of John Cusak, whom he was a fan of. Perhaps it was because, like Vala, he had to appreciate the artistry involved. Perhaps it was because the music was better — _much_ better — than he'd expected. Or perhaps there was just something about Anastasia's plight — the simple desire to be loved and belong somewhere — that he found so compelling. He'd felt that way once. Then he'd joined SG-1.  
  
" _Arms will open wide  
I'll be safe and wanted,  
finally home,  
where I belong,_ "  
  
Anastasia sang, and Daniel thought he caught Vala sniffle and brush a hand at her face. Brushing away a tear?  
  
" _Home, love, family  
There was once a time  
I must have had them, too  
Home, love, family  
I will never be complete  
until I find you!_ "  
  
It occurred to him that, though he'd felt badly when he'd realised he'd never told her he'd been married, in actuality she'd probably told him as little — maybe even less — about her _own_ past. Was she remembering her family now? Did she miss them? Or had she never truly had one, and that was why she'd grown to be so self-serving? Was she relating all too well now to this story's orphaned girl? The song ended, and his thoughts turned back to the film — _mostly_.  
  
He was so absorbed, he failed to notice that, in resting his arm over the back of the couch, he'd given Vala an opening to lean against him, as she slung her legs over the left arm of the loveseat. The funny thing was, she didn’t notice their close proximity either, though she doubtless would have considered a hard-won victory if she'd been aware of it.  
  
He was the first to notice their rather casually-intimate pose, thanks to the film's villain. Rasputin, the zombified wizard-monk, dropped putrid body parts all over the place as he sang through rotting teeth. Daniel was suddenly very aware of the vast quantities of sugar he's consumed that evening; he was certain he could feel his own teeth decaying by the millisecond. In remembering the soda, his bladder suddenly made its presence known as well. In his decision to use the facilities, he realised Vala was resting against him, quite contentedly it seemed. He was loath to disturb her, teeth be damned, but his bladder wasn't too cooperative. Remembering what his grandfather had told him about Tycho Brahe — the astronomer had, some stories said, died of uremia because it was bad manners to get up during the hours-long meals of his day — Daniel reluctantly heeded the organ's demands.  
  
He paused the DVR. "Ah, sorry, Nature calls...."  
  
"I hate it when people call when I'm watching TV," Vala groused as Daniel got up. "But I didn’t hear the phone ring ...?" she pointed out, then seemed to realise he was headed for the exit, not the bathroom. "You could hear your phone all the way over here?" she marveled.  
  
"Er, no," he said, pausing in the doorway. "I just meant I had to use the bathroom, and I figured I'd use mine so I could brush my teeth. I'll be back in a couple of minutes."  
  
"Ohhh! Well, hurry on then!" she ordered, waving him along. "Skip to your loo, my darling," she added with a wink.  
  
People passing in the hall stared as Daniel chuckled his way from her door to his; he supposed few people were used to seeing him smile these days. He couldn't help it; it was funny how Vala sometimes picked up obscure Earth references but still missed fairly common ones ....

When he returned to her quarters, she was just leaving her own "loo", and running her tongue over her teeth. "I'll never get over how lovely that feels! You know, we should look into becoming toothpaste distributors for the rest of the galaxy — I bet we’d make a killing!"  
  
He laughed and shook his head at her as he settled back into his spot on the couch. "Vala Mal Doran, Intergalactic Toothpaste Salesperson Extraordinaire?"  
  
"Oooh, good point," she said quite seriously as she sat next to him. "'Death of a Salesman' and all that." She nodded sagely, and he knew then that she had only heard the title and never seen or read the play.  
  
"Something like that," he said, smiling and not bothering to tell her what the play was really about. If thinking that the story was about the _murder_ of a salesman kept her from taking up this new profession, well then, it was all for the better.... For whom, though, he wouldn’t contemplate.

 

~ * @ * ~

  
He rest his arm atop the couch again, in what seemed a silent invitation, which she gladly took, this time swinging her legs over his and snuggling against him. She rest the back of one hand and the palm of the other against his chest. Then she braced herself slightly, expecting him to object. Instead, he brought the arm down, resting it against her back, his hand now lightly gripping her arm. Then he brought his other arm down so that his forearm lay across her legs just under the knees, his fingers wrapping around her calf. He rest his cheek against her head, inhaling deeply. She relaxed, smiling contentedly. As time went on, Daniel's thumbs gently brushed against her skin, unconsciously; the motion was soothing, apparently to him as much as her: they were both half-asleep by the end of the movie. In their stupor, the strains of the ending theme were inescapable.  
  
" _No one told me  
I was goin' to find you  
Unexpected,  
what you did to my heart,_ "  
  
Richard Marx sang, but in Vala's sleepy state, it was Daniel's voice she heard.

 

* * *

A shivering sort of warmth swept under Daniel's skin as the words forced him to face his feelings towards the woman in his arms. The rest of the song drifted to him in fits and starts, in keeping with the eb and flow of his drowsy consciousness.  
  
" _We were strangers  
on a crazy adventure,_ "  
  
Donna Lewis sang.  
  
_Crazy doesn’t even **begin** to describe it_ , Daniel mused, his mind giving him a rapid slideshow of events: getting body-swapped with a couple in another galaxy, Vala getting burned alive and then miraculously healed, the Kor Mak fiasco, Vala possessing his body, their getting past Merlin's booby-traps ....  
  
" _Now here we stand,  
unafraid of the future_ "  
  
_Don't I wish!_ he thought.  
  
" _I'll be there  
when the world stops turning  
I'll be there  
when the storm is through  
In the end,  
I wanna be standing  
at the beginning  
with you ...._ "  
  
And there was that promise again. Vala's hand gripped Daniel's shirt, the cloth bunching under her fingers. Even as is awareness faded, he could vaguely feel what felt like a drop or two of rain on his chest. His arms circled her, his last though being that he needed to shield her from the storm the song warned of.

Twenty minutes later, Daniel was jolted awake by a loud voice from the television. He quickly turned the TV off, the only light left coming from the nightstand by Vala's bed. Her deep breathing told him she was still asleep, even if she didn’t really snore. With a bit of struggling to the edge of the loveseat, he managed to lift himself off the couch with her still in his arms. She didn't awaken. He smiled, envious of her ability to sleep so soundly, and carried her carefully over to her bed. He'd just gotten her tucked under the covers and was about to bring a chair over when she bolted upright and awake.  
  
"Don’t go!" she pleaded, reaching out a hand.  
  
A bolt of anguish flared in him. It hurt to see her so vulnerable. He smiled reassuringly and carried the chair over to her bedside, arranging it so that he sat on it backwards while still facing her. "I wasn't," he said softly. "I was just getting this," he explained, patting the chair's back for emphasis.  
  
Now she looked guilty. "Daniel, you can’t spend the whole night in a _chair_! You need to be all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, in case something happens!"  
  
He shook his head. She was right, but he'd made a promise. "I'll be fine; I've gone for long periods on worse sleep."  
  
"Daniel," she began slowly, as if he were an especially dense child, "it's a big bed, certainly big enough for the both of us." She swept a hand at the vast space, to illustrate.  
  
He suddenly felt like a rabbit trapped by a fox -- but not because of her.  
  
Still, she clearly interpreted his reaction that way, eyes flashing genuine hurt. "I _can_ behave myself, if _that's_ what you're worried about."  
  
"Oh, god, you — no, Vala, that's not—"

 

~ * @ * ~

 

She didn’t think the blushing was so cute this time.

She feigned indifference. "Fine. If I'm so repulsive to be around, just—" Her composure was cracking; she couldn’t say another word, or the waterworks would start, and there was no way she'd be that weak. Not in front of him, at any rate. She gripped the sheets like she'd gripped his shirt not long ago, looking away.  
  
She heard him sigh and sensed him stand. She closed her eyes, stifling a curse when she realised the action caused a few tears to fall. But she kept them closed, waiting for the sound of the door to the hall being opened and closed.  
  
But the tread of his feet seemed to grow louder, not softer, and suddenly the bed dipped a little.  
  
"Vala," he said, sounding tired. How she _hated_ when he said her name like that!  
  
She turned her head away stubbornly. "I don’t want to hear it, Daniel. Just ... just go already." _Go, so I can sob my little heart out._ Maybe if she could relieve the pressure, the wretchedly fragile organ wouldn’t break.  
  
She felt his fingers against her cheek, not trying to force her, just cupping her face gently, his thumb stroking away some of her tears. She felt a slow burn work its way across her lips and down her neck. Despite her better judgment, she leaned into his hand.  
  
"Vala," he said again, softly. She liked the sound of her name much better this time, especially when he added "Please...", and sounded so tormented doing it.  
  
She opened her eyes and turned to him, warily, his face just inches from hers. It was his turn to look away, taking his hand from her cheek and laying it over her own hand.  
  
_Here it comes,_ she thought, bracing herself, closing her eyes again as if she expected a physical blow — which in a way, she supposed, she did. _I wonder what it will be? "I don’t want you getting the wrong idea about us", or "I think you're getting too attached", or maybe the classic "Let's just be friends"?..._  
  
"What ..." his voice cracked. He took off his glasses and lay them on the nightstand, then looked skyward and closed his eyes. "What if I don’t _want_ you to behave yourself?" he asked quietly.  
  
Her eyes snapped open.  
  
"What if ... _I_ ... can't behave _my_ self?" he asked in a whisper, looking back at her, their lips just scant inches apart once more.  
  
She could only think of one answer to his question.  
  


~ * @ * ~

_So this is what they mean by "afterglow"_ , Vala thought as she lie nestled against Daniel's side, head resting against his shoulder as he held her close, kissing the top of her head reassuringly now and then. She certainly _felt_ like she was glowing, her skin warm and tingly. Especially her left hand, which was occupied in a strange sort of dance with Daniel's right; sometimes he seemed to be absently tracing symbols into her palm, and other times he just brushed his fingertips and palm sensuously against her own and the back of her hand. It was all she could handle at that moment, the full-body experience having left her exhausted and sated in a way she hadn't known possible.  
  
With every other lover, the experiences had been all frantic friction and groping — the harder and faster, the better. But Daniel's touches had been feather-light and tender, stoking her ardour in a slow, delicious burn. She'd felt his presence a hundred times more than any tooth-and-nail-using bed-partner, as he made every inch of her feel cherished.  
  
As she once again began drifting off into dreams, the words "I love you," fell from her lips as easily as if she'd said it to him a thousand times already — and _meant_ it.  
  
"I love you, too," he replied, just as easily and earnestly. He was still holding her hand, against his chest now, as they dropped into oblivion.  
  


 

* * *

  
"Hello, Daniel."  
  
Daniel's eyes snapped open to meet Sha're's own. He felt a flush of guilt, having her see him with another woman in his arms, but it passed quickly. Rather than pushing Vala away, her drew her closer, protectively, even possessively, eyeing Sha're uncertainly.  
  
Sha're reached out and brushed the sleeping Vala's cheek affectionately. "She's been starved of love for so very long, Daniel — and you have a wealth of love to give. There is room enough for her _and_ I in your heart, just as there is room for you both in mine. And she, too, has an infinite capacity to love, now that you've helped her to open the door. She'll need it, in the days to come, this Mother of the Ori. Take care of her, Daniel, for all our sakes ... and know that the joy you share with her is mine as well."  
  
His fond smile was only slightly bittersweet as she faded from view. The smile stayed as he nestled his cheek in Vala's hair, and the comforting darkness claimed him once more.  
  


# # #

  
"C'mon, Jackson, up an' at 'em!" Mitchell called through Daniel's door, rapping on it again. After waiting another impatient few seconds, he tried to open the door, on a whim. He was rewarded: the door was unlocked.  
  
"Cam!" Sam protested.  
  
Mitchell ignored her, poking his head through the door. "Huh. It's empty," he informed her and Teal'c. "He's not in his office, or Landry's, and no one's seen him anywhere else this morning. Where the heck is he?"  
  
"No one has yet seen Vala Mal Doran, either," Teal'c pointed out.  
  
"Eh, she's probably just sleeping in. Non-pertinent personnel can do that, you know." He turned to her door. "Not really fair, if you ask me. We've been up since what, 6 a.m.?"  
  
"I have been up since 5:30," Teal'c pointed out helpfully.  
  
Mitchell gave him a patronizing, what-a-good-little-Jaffa sort of expression before shooting Sam a pained look. Sam grinned.

"My point," Mitchell began, glancing at his watch, "is that it's 6: _25_ now, and Landry said he wants _all_ of SG-1 in the briefing by Oh-Seven-Hundred. And if _we_ have to suffer through a briefing at that ungodly hour, then by golly, I'm gonna make sure _she_ does too."  
  
"My, how charmingly spiteful of you, Cam," Sam said.  
  
"Never claimed to be otherwise, sweetheart," Mitchell replied with a smirk, rapping on Vala's door. "Besides, she's the one who wanted to join the team so badly..." Never mind the fact that he'd grown to like her rather quickly, and she'd proven herself quite useful. "Oy, Vala! Rise and shine, princess, if ya want time for a shower and breakfast before Landry puts ya t'work!"  
  
Again, he made a successful attempt to get through the door, eliciting another protest from Sam as he waltzed in. He opened his mouth to speak, and left his jaw hanging open in mute shock as he stopped short.  
  
Daniel was in Vala's bed. The twosome was mostly covered by a blanket, but by their bare shoulders and legs, he hazarded a guess that they weren't wearing much of anything beneath it.  
  
Cameron felt as though his brain was leaking out his ears.  
  
Seeing Mitchell's sudden halt and his back tense, Sam stepped up, afraid something was wrong. She and Mitchell quickly turned, Mitchell's face beet-red and Sam covering a delighted grin with her hand, lest a laugh leak through and wake the pair.  
  
Tealc, who was tall enough to easily see over Sam's head, raised a brow and smiled wide. "I believe I have won the betting pool," he informed them.  
  


 

~ * @ * ~

  
  
"Think they're gone?" Vala asked a full minute after Mitchell had closed her door. She peeked one eye open and glanced towards it, as if she could see through it and answer her own question.  
  
"Yup," Daniel replied, apparently unwilling to lift either of his own lids.  
  
"Mitchell had point — I suppose if we want showers and breakfast, we'd best get up now," she sighed.  
  
"Yup."  
  
She opened her other eye and looked back at him, studying his features affectionately. "I can think of another thing I’d like to do this morning too, before facing Landry," she purred, drawing lazy circles on his bare chest. "And it's something we could do in the shower, so it wouldn’t really take any extra time." That wasn't really true, but she didn’t much care.  
  
"We can't sleep in the shower, we'll drown," he deadpanned, eyes still shut.  
  
She swatted him lightly. Then she got an idea. "We could wash each other with our tongues, like cats," she suggested, licking his arm for emphasis.  
  
He finally looked at her, and smirked. "And that would take care of breakfast, too, I suppose?"  
  
"Are you calling _me_ your breakfast?" she asked, grinning.  
  
"Are you asking me to taste you?" he asked in return, both his voice and his lips smiling.  
  
She kissed him in lieu of a reply.  
  


~ * @ * ~

  
  
They arrived, breathless and more than a little rumpled, exactly two minutes after they were supposed to be in the briefing room.  
  
Vala noted with a venomous sort of satisfaction that Sam, Teal'c, and especially Mitchell were unable to look herself or Daniel in the eye. She found Daniel blushing a bit as well. _Bonus!_  
  
Landry, not being privy to the morning's events or where Daniel had spent the night, was suitably grumpy. "Well? Do you two need an invitation?" he asked, gesturing to the empty chairs on his right.  
  
Immediately chastened, Vala and Daniel hurried to their seats, Daniel ending up in the one closest to Landry.  
  
Vala caught the eye of Sam, who sat across from her, and winked conspiratorially. Sam grinned. Vala's irritation at Sam's part in the morning's wake-up call (and the betting pool) had faded in favor of the notion of having a girl to talk to about the previous night.  
  
Truth be told, Vala would be fine with the betting pool too, once she bullied Teal'c into giving her fifty percent — at _least_ — of his winnings.  
  
There was a loud gurgle; it only took a moment for everyone else to realise the sound was coming from Vala. "Sorry, didn’t have time for breakfast this morning. Aren't you supposed to have donuts or something for these meetings?"  
  
"This isn’t some frilly corporation, missy," Landry informed her sourly. "You should have gotten up earlier and eaten in the mess."  
  
It was Daniel's stomach that gurgled next.  
  
" _You_ skipped breakfast too?" Landry asked impatiently. "Honestly, Jackson, _her_ being late and looking like she just crawled out of bed, I understand—"  
  
"Oh, _he_ had breakfast," Vala interrupted with a predatory smile >  
  
Gratifyingly, Cameron almost choked on his coffee.  
  
Landry sniffed the air a moment. "Jackson ... are you wearing _rose perfume?_ "  
  
Cameron snorted. Sam's lips went thin with suppressed mirth. Teal'c remained stoic and serene, the only sign of his own amusement being a slight raising of one brow. Daniel turned red and stared at the table, as if contemplating hiding beneath it. Vala grinned widely.  
  
Landry looked speculatively at each of them. "Never mind," he eventually sighed, shuffling the papers in front of him. "I really _don't_ want to know."

~ FINIS ~

**Author's Note:**

> You can see art I did for this fic [here](http://wolfenm.deviantart.com/art/Stargate-SG-1-Daniel-Vala-39086208).
> 
> ####################  
> If you've enjoyed my writing, I invite you to explore my original fantasy storyverse, [Gaiankind](http://gaiankind.com)! You can even find Gaiankind stories for free [here](http://archiveofourown.org/tags/Gaiankind) on AO3!


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